Thanksgiving: Comeuppance Edition

Ana barfed all day yesterday, which is ironic because a) she's Seinfeldian in her barfing tendencies; and b) it was Thanksgiving, which is a holiday formed around eating, which is one of her favorite pastimes. This can only mean that she was being punished by God.

Luckily for me, she felt good enough to still make it to dinner at the Tabard Inn, where I had this magnormous pork tenderloin chop. Unlucky for her, she had one bite of her meal and almost barfed. Not because it was gross.


Then she didn't feel up to going to Black Cat, which is a great DC tradition, but I did, so I left her at home. Shortly thereafter, Safia hijacked my phone and took some pictures:


Know who wasn't punished by God? Me

Thanksgiving List 2008

1. I did not just cut my finger off while making a sandwich, which was a pretty close call.

2. Our country is so amazing that when somebody makes a goofy offer to give everybody soda pop and fails, the lawyers get involved. Also, the most prestigious newspaper in the land writes an article about it.

3. Dinner tonight is going to involve some parsnip puree, y'all.

4. In lieu of usual screaming matches, landlord/downstairs neighbor and wife are observing the holiday with some Wilburys. Actually, they might be cranking the Wilburys in order to mask their usual screaming match.

5. Upcoming visit to Atlanta for early Christmas celebration, which will include dinner with brother and sister.

Fanksgiffing Travel Tips

We took a quick trip to Atlanta for Thanksgiving to see my family, and to eat. Which is how visiting the South works, basically.

First: drive around for 5 hours looking for a CVS or a Walgreens or some place that sells things to cure Ana's typhoid. Next, breakfast at Ria's Bluebird Cafe. (Travel tip #1: Do this.)


Next: check into brother's girlfriend's apartment, which she is lending us while she's out of town. What do we do? Contaminate it! Sorry about the typhus germs, Sarah! Ha, ha! Another dose of Airborne, please!


What's good for typhoid, you ask? Beer!


Travel tip #2: watch local news. Because you don't care about the scary parts, the feel-good stories are a source of pure comedy.


So Thanksgiving rolls around, and because consumptives can't sleep very well, the best idea is to visit Waffle House. This particular Waffle House was a "Hash-Slinging Zone," which was fine with me. They also don't like firearms. But those things don't matter, really.


What matters is that Waffle House produces delicious, delicious food. Get that shit on Texas Toast, people. It's good for you.


Later, Ana is released from quarantine long enough to do some cooking at my parent's house. Travel tip #3: do things the way she likes, or she'll yell at you.


Then eat and go visit Grandma. I'd give you a picture, but if I had tried to get my camera out she probably would've broken it. Grandma weighs about 80lbs these days, which is not cool at all. But she still rules. As if she couldn't.

And later, we go with my brother looking for a place to get a beer. We found one called "Pufferbelly's" which included this Monster® Energy Drink poster of a woman's backside with a can of Monster® Energy Drink tucked conveniently in her thong:


In short, Pufferbelly's ruled. Happy Thanksgiving.