Friday Thing Facts: Correct Predictions + People With Awesome Names Aren't Always Awesome

Happy Fourth of July, people. Enjoy your outdoor festivities and think of me when you roll into the bar after polishing off the first case of BL Lime. I will be the one nurturing your heat stroke and divining whether or not you are going to pass out immediately or just after we close.

In other news, I was right, and a lefty will be president again. Look at what the last eight years with a righty has given us! (Hint: not just foreclosures.)


In other news, Jesse Helms died. Awesome name; not-so-awesome dude.

DeffoPolitics Presents: PresidentWatch2008: PREDICTIONS!!

The only thing I care about in politics is who is and is not left handed. Why, you ask? Because since 1974, every president except for the bad ones has been left handed, and so am I. I will likely be president very soon.

GOOD PRESIDENTS; LEFT HANDED

• Gerald Ford
• Ronald Reagan
• George H.W. Bush
• Bill Clinton

BAD PRESIDENTS; RIGHT HANDED

• Jimmy Carter
• George W. Bush
  

(I'm including Jimmy Carter and George W. Bush in the "bad ones" category because they're both right-handed, and they cancel each other out when it comes to foreign policy. Likewise, I'm putting Gerald Ford in the "good presidents" category because he's left handed and didn't really want to be president, it just kind of happened to him. Plus, he was nice.)

This election is no different:




BONUSBONUSBONUS ANA DOES LAUNDRY