Last year I was mildly successful. By which I mean that I predicted that the two teams that played in the championship would both lose in the third round. This year I predict that I will get every game right. Even if I don't, at least I'm not a flip-flopper like a particular head of state.
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After watching zero college basketball games this season, I'm currently 18-2 and in 54th place out of 5900 in the Post's bracket pool. Thanks, Western Kentucky!
Update: 24 hours later, I'm 24-9 and in 1003rd place. Whatever.
We're moving seven blocks north and two blocks east. That's like 50 miles, which means: new bodega (you will be missed, Best DC Supermarket), new grocery store ($20 for a sandwich, chips and drink at Whole Foods: you will not be missed), and new late-night haunts. See:
Destination: Whole Foods Current Distance .7 mi New Distance 1.1 mi Verdict Likely will lose except for in cases of meat and produce.
Destination: Giant Current Distance 1.3 mi New Distance .6 mi Verdict Giant wins: see prev.
Destination: Work Current Distance 1.1 mi New Distance 1.8 mi Verdict Must leave house 7 minutes earlier.
Destination: Black Cat Current Distance .2 mi New Distance 1.1 mi Verdict It's still the Black Cat. Stumbling home will include large hill, which is a bummer.
Destination: Pharmacy Bar/Bourbon Current Distance 1.1 mi New Distance 1.3 mi Verdict Push: still worth rolling up at 1am on Sunday.
Destination: Chinatown Current Distance 2.4mi New Distance 2.6mi Verdict Can avoid Tuesday through Saturday at same frequency as before.
Destination: Pho Current Distance 3.6 mi New Distance 4.3 mi Verdict It's Pho. As if.
Destination: Zipcars Current Distance 7 within 1 block New Distance 4 within 1 block Verdict Must reserve early in order to get Pho.
All in all, it becomes apparent that moving 9 blocks away means that things are approximately 9 blocks further away than they used to be.
The Post has started a new tradition of having Tony Kornheiser submit his NCAA tournament bracket with funny notes on it. Here's my copycat version (follow it here), which is 7-1 so far:
Last night we went to see a movie. Once, I enjoyed seeing intellectually stimulating, or sad, or enigmatic independent films, largely in other languages and with budgets around $6500 US. Later, I became an adult and realized that movies aren't about learning things; they're about being entertained with as little thought as possible.
So instead of There Will Be Blood's thought-provoking, nuanced portrayals of a tormented American archetype, we went to see Be Kind Rewind, where movie stars make their own versions of popular American movies. It was good. And don't be fooled! Making your own version of a movie is harder than it seems. Cf. their version of Rush Hour v. an amateur's version of Ghost. Hint: the amateur's version suxxx.
After the movie we went to Clyde's for their 1/2 price raw bar happy hour, at which point the bartender convinced us that in lieu of two dozen oysters and a lobster cocktail we could spend ten dollars more and get Clyde's ShellfishStravaganza, which includes a dozen oysters, a dozen clams, a dozen jumbo shrimp, a dozen crab claws, and a lobster. Why not? It's only midnight, right? Should sit well.
Iodine poisoning is a bummer, but the food was delicious.
In other versions of ideas that started in a good place and end in grotesque excess, here's a picture of my neighbor's van, which he repainted in his backyard a couple months ago:
In tiny letters, it says "Boycott" and "purveyors around "Veal."
BONUSBONUSBONUS Don't forget that March Madness
SUPERBONUS Everyone who starred in "Roadhouse" is dying of cancer. Please, the following should see a doctor:
A friend devised this bracket while driving from one town in the Deep South to the other town in the Deep South. I added my own observations:
They are wise down there, I've always said.
Sunday was a beautiful day. It was the introduction of Spring! We were all happy. We sat outside with friends. The horror of winter was behind us. Oh--and it was all a LIE. My widgets tell me so. Look.
Luckily for me, the dryer in our house quit drying things this week. So after two days of unsuccessful attempts at tumble drying a load of laundry to some semblance of dryness, I bit the bullet: I would go to the laundromat.
So I did what any other self-respecting person would do in the same situation. I rented a Volvo S40 from Zipcar for an hour and a half, drove my bag of laundry three blocks to the laundromat, put it in the dryer, and sat in the car listening to talk radio.
In other news, my bracket isn't looking all that great. I did pick Winthrop to beat Notre Dame, though.
