Saturday Grab-Bag

This picture of me and Mitch has been on the fridge for a while but I thought it was worth sharing with the world. For reference, this is the morning after we got to New Orleans in 1999 (I think) for Mardi Gras. Look how tough we are, what with the cigarettes and white-dude gang signs!


Yes, those are the remnants of blond in my hair. That's what's called being with it.

I may or may not include my childhood dog in new tattoo. The whole inside of the arm is free, and lookit!


Mini Restaurant Review Time! Ray's Hell Burger (sister restaurant of Ray's the Steaks/the Classics) is right next to Pho 75, so it's taken us a while to have a burger instead of delicious soup. Today we did.
It comes with corn on the cob and watermelon, and Dominion's draft root beer is available in chilled mugs. Verdict: read the last sentence. Duh.

The Olympic opening ceremonies were last night, which resulted in a treasure trove of text messages. A couple good ones:

from Anne: look @ team usa's gear. they are so ready for yacht rock

another from Anne: i'm pretty sure craig sager's tailor makes bank outfitting olympians*

Craig Sager

from Joe: do you think bush is at the olympics in hopes of an assassination as a graceful way out of a failing presidency?

*Thing I learned from Craig Sager's Wikipedia page: he was waiting for Hank Aaron at home plate after his 715th home run. (36 second mark here)

DEFFOVERSARY PHLOGIVERSARY CLIP PHLOG OMG PLUS CONSUMER WATCH 2000 PLUS BEST GIFT EVER

On this day one year ago, we experienced the DC judicial system from within, which somehow prompted me to begin phlogging. A year later, and how far we've come! I've phlogged about things 147 times. That's once every two and a half days!

Mostly it has had to do with cats, but also other things sometimes.

What do I have for you lo on this wondrous phlogiversary? A quick look into the nefarious innerworkings of corporate America!

See, a couple weeks ago I needed a suit, so I went to Bloomingdale's. Natch. They had a sale. Bernard (my fashion consultant) hooked it up

(Ana is her own fashion consultant) and even persuaded me to open up a Bloomingdale's account.


Not only an insider, people. PREMIER INSIDER. I saved $47.

I'm pretty sure the only other store credit card I've ever had was for Structure, which I opened with the purchase of a pair of cargo pants and never paid.

But anyway. I received my card in the mail last week, but it wasn't accompanied by a bill or a billing address, or my balance. So I went online to pay it off today (I'm pretty sure the APR is somewhere around 47%), and after a thorough search of "Bloomies" (premier insider jargon) online, I realized that it is impossible to pay one's Bloomingdale card balance on the internet.

I then called customer service, which told me that I could pay my balance at any Bloomingdale's store. That seemed like a hassle, so I asked if I could pay over the phone. Sure, they said, but it's going to require a $10 processing fee. Those damned corporations! Geniuses! I paid the $10.

Thus concludes my consumer lesson for 2008.

BONUSBONUSBONUS I forgot to include a picture of Ana's secret santa gift from Abe a couple weeks ago, so here it is: The Best Present Ever:

Now, I know you can't read it, so here's the transcription:

ANYONE FUCKS WITH ANA
GETS HACKED UP AND SEALED
IN A 55 GALLON DRUM

I particularly like the specific nature of the threat.