Thank God It Comes With Free Dr. Pepper

Chinese Democracy comes out on Sunday. Klosterman gave it an A-, which only means that he's lost any ability to listen to music objectively. Cuz it's streaming on MySpace right now, and it's TERRIBLE. (Seriously. Do yourself a favor and listen to "Street of Dreams." It's laughable.) Did Klosterman get caught in some wackedy time continuum?

A song like "Shackler's Revenge" is initially average, until you get to the solo—then it becomes the sonic equivalent of a Russian robot wrestling a reticulating python.

So it's like a rusty, failing piece of antiquated technology being strangled by a snake? It's an apt metaphor, I just don't see how it's a positive one.

My review: it sounds like the Guns n' Roses album I would've produced as a goof after downing a bottle of Robitussin and listening to November Rain on loop for 9 hours in 2002.

The good thing is that Dr. Pepper hated on Axl, and got burned.