ME+JEFF G=BFF 4EVR OMG LOLZ !!!1! PLUS HE KIND OF OUTS HIMSELF

Alot of people out there are COOT GALOOT SHERPA CLODs and don't have PERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS with JEFF G via THE INTERNET. Others of us, ME, do.

First, here's my Yelp! profile pic (my childhood dog, who will soon be immortalized):

And of course, here's Jeff's:

(Aside: he just looks like your everyday dude, huh? Just a little gel here, a little groomed facial hair there, a little Soul Rebel for good measure)

So I sent Jeff G a message on Yelp the other day, admiring his reviews and noting that they are THE BEST ON YELP, PLZ KEEP IT UP. And what do you know but JG wrote be back, and wicked promptly!

Unfortunately, his message was bereft of capital letters. It was also bereft of the things we all love about him: grammatical errors, creative spellings of arcane adjectives (WHINGY?), and vitriol. Look at this boring thing:

Hey Scott
Thanks for your awesome compliment. Thanks for reading my reviews. I really appreciate it and it means a lot to me that you enjoy them.

I don't know how to react to this. It is like a normal response from a non-lunatic.

Then comes the bam: Jeff G. outs himself! So much for his WAIFISH ASIAN GIRLFRIEND (WHERE DOES SHE BARTEND, PEOPLE?!?):

Anyhow, I love your dog by the way! Whats his/her name! He looks like he's a bundle! You should put some more pics up!
Ciao
Jeff

I'm not hating, I'm just saying that straight dudes don't A) love YORKSHIRE TERRIERS or B) refer to them as "bundles."

So begins my lifelong friendship with Jeff G.